“I followed Marie on social media for a few years before reserving a shoot and finally booked my session about 8 months in advance of my shoot date. I wanted it to be special and to be a representation of my best self, so I chose my half birthday as the date!
Now as women, especially before a big event we tend to pick ourselves apart and try to 'better ourselves' as much as possible given the amount of time before the event. This process may be losing weight, going to the tanning salon, buying new outfits, getting your hair and nails done, etc.
In my case, it was weight. Over the past 5 years due to a variety of reasons, I've gained 40 lbs. And over those years, I've accepted myself in every form... except in front of the camera. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes. I know this... but our society and dating in this era gives women indirect messages that they are not enough. We are not skinny enough, too clingy, too needy, not pretty without make up, too sensitive, too loud and the list goes on…
We all feel broken, confused and not worthy at some point in life. We all have our own story.
Approaching your mid 30's and being unmarried, how the world sees you plays a game with your mind. You question 'what if', you wonder 'how come', you say 'if only', and you ask yourself 'why not me?' Well, I told myself to ignore all those messages and learn how to be proud of who I am now. I have curves, bruises, scars, and tattoos. I am not what the world thinks of as “perfect”. I don't have abs and according to my BMI, I should lose 30lbs and depending on the angle, I have a double chin. But I am ME.
I wanted to do a boudoir shoot with Marie to feel sexy in my own skin. To feel empowered as a woman and to love every curve, no matter where it falls. I still have days that are better than others, but now I actually believe that any 'tweaks' I do to better my health, are just that; for my health, for ME.
I know in this moment, I am beautiful. I am me.
And every now and then, we all need proof outside of our own reflection to actually believe it.”